This morning, after church, I spent time with my 2 favorite guys, my husband and my son. As we sat eating lunch together, and Shane looks up at me and says in that sweet voice of his "mommy, thanks for fixing my lunch so it's easier for me to eat" (all I did was cut it up in to little boy size bites, but that means a lot to him).
It's so interesting to me the things that Shane appreciates. Toys, activities, getting to stay up late, those are the things that Shane doesn't SEEM to appreciate very much. It's the little things that surprise me when he makes a big deal about them. Whether it is helping him brush his teeth right, or making him a glass of chocolate milk. He is a very "thankful" kid and I appreciate that, but it also hurts sometimes. To know that he's had so little in his life, that he recognizes that these little things are a big deal. How many kids at the age of 8 years old recognize the small things? I know I'm certainly learning a lot from this beautiful little boy. I'm learning to appreciate the things I have.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Boys...
What is it about frogs that is so fascinating to little boys? And why do they think it's hilarious to chase their moms around with them just to hear mom scream? Why is it that every little boy has polarized feet so that puddles of water draw them in like a magnet? What is it about dirt that no matter how little there is, it will end up on his face?
See, it's been one of those incredibly awesome days in the life of a little boy. He's tromped in water, searched for minnows in the creek, came home smelling just awful from sweat because he was playing so hard. He has played from sun up until sun down and the day isn't over!
To watch him play makes my heart light. All the troubles of the world seem to fade when I see the smile on his face, and in his eyes. Sitting at the table, he quietly says "mom, can I have a hug? I've been so busy playing today that I haven't gotten very many!" He's just incredible. Sure, being chased around trying to see if the frog will pee on me isn't my idea of fun, but it sure is his! And, I intend to do everything I can to ensure that this little boy has more fun than his share! Sure, there are hard times, and times when I have to put my foot down, but the beautiful, sweet smile of that little boy, and his soft voice saying "mom..I love you" seem to wash the hard times away.
I'm so thankful for this precious gift that I've been given. I just pray that I do right by him and raise him in a way that makes him know that he is loved, wanted, appreciated, and worth more than his weight in the buried treasure that he loves to hunt.
See, it's been one of those incredibly awesome days in the life of a little boy. He's tromped in water, searched for minnows in the creek, came home smelling just awful from sweat because he was playing so hard. He has played from sun up until sun down and the day isn't over!
To watch him play makes my heart light. All the troubles of the world seem to fade when I see the smile on his face, and in his eyes. Sitting at the table, he quietly says "mom, can I have a hug? I've been so busy playing today that I haven't gotten very many!" He's just incredible. Sure, being chased around trying to see if the frog will pee on me isn't my idea of fun, but it sure is his! And, I intend to do everything I can to ensure that this little boy has more fun than his share! Sure, there are hard times, and times when I have to put my foot down, but the beautiful, sweet smile of that little boy, and his soft voice saying "mom..I love you" seem to wash the hard times away.
I'm so thankful for this precious gift that I've been given. I just pray that I do right by him and raise him in a way that makes him know that he is loved, wanted, appreciated, and worth more than his weight in the buried treasure that he loves to hunt.
Saturday, September 1, 2007
Too Long Gone...
It's been way too long since I've updated my Blog. Life got crazy over the summer and I simply didn't take the time to sit down and write.
This was my first summer to be off and have a son! So, it was a brand new experience for me, but it was good. We all had a good summer, but I believe we were all ready for school to start.
Shane met his new teacher and she seems quite nice. Shane has always liked school, so I hope that continues for many many years.
We started Shane taking Tang Soo Do a couple weeks ago. He asks almost daily if we are going and he seems to really enjoy it. I hope that sticks with him too!
This summer has been interesting because I've been doing a lot of thinking as usual. I watch other moms with their children and I see the bond that they have. They've had since their child was in their womb to develop that bond and I so want to have the same bond with Shane. I know he still, even though the adoption is final, has doubts as to whether we truly love him and whether he will really be with us forever. I hope those doubts melt away soon and he allows us to hold his heart...truly hold it and care for it the way parents should.
I long for the day that I can be the mom that I see so many others being. I have this vision of being the perfect mom. Doing and saying all the right things, and I know that will never be the case, but I want to be the best mom possible for Shane, so I'll keep working on me, and do whatever I can to help Shane trust us fully.
This was my first summer to be off and have a son! So, it was a brand new experience for me, but it was good. We all had a good summer, but I believe we were all ready for school to start.
Shane met his new teacher and she seems quite nice. Shane has always liked school, so I hope that continues for many many years.
We started Shane taking Tang Soo Do a couple weeks ago. He asks almost daily if we are going and he seems to really enjoy it. I hope that sticks with him too!
This summer has been interesting because I've been doing a lot of thinking as usual. I watch other moms with their children and I see the bond that they have. They've had since their child was in their womb to develop that bond and I so want to have the same bond with Shane. I know he still, even though the adoption is final, has doubts as to whether we truly love him and whether he will really be with us forever. I hope those doubts melt away soon and he allows us to hold his heart...truly hold it and care for it the way parents should.
I long for the day that I can be the mom that I see so many others being. I have this vision of being the perfect mom. Doing and saying all the right things, and I know that will never be the case, but I want to be the best mom possible for Shane, so I'll keep working on me, and do whatever I can to help Shane trust us fully.
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